The video, Memoría,
deals again with the idea of "healing" oneself. This piece has a broader
interpretation than Nurture. I've heard comments of it being
about life, death, and rebirth. I originally conceived this piece in
1994, when I was drawn toward film, not video. At that time I filmed
myself with an 8mm camera, lying down in my bed. I placed handkerchiefs
over my face and ate them. After I had chewed up one, I spit it out
and continued with the next. I did this six times. This film didn't
work because it is too dark and the action can't be seen. But the concept
stayed with me. In 1995 I did a second version of the piece, a performance.
My assistant, had soaked six handkerchiefs, first in vinegar and then
in water. She placed one hanky on my face at a time, I ate it, then
she pulled it out of my mouth and discarded it in a wash basin which
was beside the bed. This particular piece was never documented.
In 1997 I redid the performance
for the purposes of making a video. For the video I place the handkerchief
on my face. Memoría is a nine-minute video without sound.
The one and half-minute source footage is slowed to nine minutes. The
image is cropped and in black and white, reminiscent of a film or photograph.
The image is of my face, which is slowly eating, consuming one hanky.
In time my entire face is revealed and at the end of the video I open
my eyes, staring at the viewer. This is the most powerful part of the
video, because in a sense I speak to the audience and say, "I'm okay,"
or "everything will be okay," or, as some suggested, "I'm alive."
Interpreting Memoria
as death is a valid connection. One year after conceiving of this activity,
I read in "Piecework" about a mourning custom used in early America.
In an article featuring mourning quilts and customs, Trechsel writes:
"Mourning customs have
become significantly less elaborate since the nineteenth century.
Mourners today are often expected to accept their losses and go on
with their lives as soon as possible. But, 'mourning objects were
external symbols of attachment and loss-and attachment continuing,
in spite of loss.'"
In another part of the article
Mrs. Opal Lee Taylor was quoted:
"People in those days were
sentimental about deaths and funerals. Caskets were made at home while
the deceased was laid out on a cooling board and covered with a quilt,
sheets were used in the summer. A silk handkerchief was placed over
their face which was lifted for the last look.10"
And when her brother had died
she remembers her father telling her to, "Take the last look at your
brother. The only time you will see him now is in heaven.11"
Winborn, Rachel M. "An
Image." Breath Then Hold Me. Iowa City, Iowa: University
of Iowa Press. 1999. 33-34.